in Gods hands
the plans of a mans heart, but it is the Lords purpose
that prevails. -Proverbs 19:21. I should have this scripture
tattooed on my forehead backwards. That way every time I looked
in the mirror I would be reminded that I dont have to try
to control everything!
Actually I have
made great strides in this area of spiritual growth. It all started
when we had to make decisions about Bennetts treatment. I
came close to being overwhelmed about making this decision. How
could I possibly make a good decision if I was not an expert in
pathology, neurooncology, radiation oncology, and neurosurgery?
Fortunately, in the midst of my frantic on-line research into all
these things, I was drawn to a book on my bookshelf. A friend gave
it to me probably two weeks before Bennett was conceived. It was
The Prayer of Jabez. Now whether you have read this book or not,
you will realize very quickly that this book does not offer solutions
to making decisions about brain tumor treatments. What it does talk
at length about is praying. The Prayer of Jabez was an important
first step prayer for me.
You would bless me indeed, enlarge my territory, that Your hand
would be with me and that You would keep me from evil, that I may
not cause pain. I Chronicles 4:10b
I prayed this
pray repeatedly. I really did not know why I was praying this prayer,
but each time I did I felt peace. Then once while I was most confused
about our choice regarding Bennetts treatment, God answered
back. He told me to ask people to pray for Bennett. He told me that
we should go to St. Jude. I was really excited about getting this
advice from God, and immediately I was given three opportunities
to directly help others by sharing my hope and optimism. Of course,
God never told me that Bennett would be cured, but that was always
my hope. From my experiences, I have learned to trust that God will
always bless us beyond our dreams if we ask, listen, and obey. What
follows are two examples.
A friend of
mine recently had problems purchasing her first home. She and her
husband did research regarding the houses in which they were interested.
They thoroughly inspected each home. And she prayed for guidance
and even for God to help them get the particular houses in which
they were interested. They placed several offers on different houses,
and even when their bid was the highest, their bid was rejected.
This happened time and time again and became a source of great frustration.
They finally resolved to build their own home on a lot of property
they liked. At the time, my friends husband was pursuing interest
in a business partnership. The plan was for my friend to leave her
job and go back to school for a career change. A couple of weeks
after they adopted the plan to build a house but before any commitments
had been made, my friends husband decided that the partnership
was not going to work out after all. The change in plans has opened
up many new opportunities for both of them career-wise. And thankfully,
they are not locked into a house contract that would have pinned
them to one area! Because I heard how this whole situation unfolded,
I can really see God at work here. Go back and read Proverbs 19:21.
I recently applied
to be part of a national Tour of Hope (www.tourofhope.org) team,
which is a cross-country (as in U.S.) cycling event to raise awareness
of the importance of cancer research. All along I prayed that God
would guide me if this were something I should do. I was selected
as a finalist out of 1200 applicants and scheduled for a phone interview.
My prayers became more intensely focused as the interview approached.
God, if there is some way I can work for you by participating
in this event please make it happen. Totally out of character
for me, I did not prepare for the interview. In fact, I volunteered
to help with a church function that left me with a major sleep deficit
on the day of the interview. I had a terrible day before the interview
and a major headache. When I finished the interview, I realized
that I had done a really horrible job. I was not clear and coherent.
I did not have information I should have had. But I told myself
that regardless of how I did, if God wanted me there, it would happen.
I will find out this week if I was selected as one of the 20 people
to be on the National Team. If I am not selected, I trust that God
has bigger plans for me. If I am, I have a job to take very seriously
because God will really have to work hard to pull this one off!
And I will be riding 400-500 miles in 9 days. I am leaving it in
Gods most trustworthy hands.
There is awesome
peace in accepting Gods guidance in your life. When things
dont work out the way I want them to, I accept that God has
different plans from me sometimes. And His plans are always way
better than anything I could have dreamed up!
is permissible-but not everything is beneficial. Everything
is permissible-but not everything is constructive. Nobody
should seek his own good but the good of others. I Corinthians
know that in all things God works for the good of those who love
him, who have been called according to his purpose. Romans
helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for,
but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words
cannot express. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of
the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance
with Gods will. -Romans 8:26-28*
*I have used
these scriptures before in other Butterfly Blessings, but they are
scriptures that pop up in all places for me. These are scriptures
that God wants me to focus on.
not forget that knowledge and skills alone cannot lead humanity
to a happy and dignified life. ... I claim credit for nothing. Everything
is determined, the beginning as well as the end, forces over which
we have no control. It is determined for the insects as well as
for the stars, Human beings, vegetables or cosmic dust, we all dance
to a mysterious tune, intoned in the distance by an invisible piper.
God, thank you for taking control. The longer I live, the more grateful
I am that I can count on you for guidance in everything I do. I
live for you. I leave my life in Your awesome trustworthy hands.